"You have changed"

Whenever people are getting out of their comfort-zone and finally start doing what’s best for them – chances are their surrounding is hitting them up with a “You have changed” in a very reproachful way. My recommendation when this happens is this: RUN.

I mean, not literally “running” but you definitely want to consider if those people still should belong in your life, because what happened is this: You actually outgrew them.

It’s time for a little truth that might hit some people: Chances are that your friends, family, colleagues – pretty much everybody in your surrounding - don’t want you to succeed and level up in life (Even if they say they do).

We are going to take a minute and emphasize “being average” for a moment: You are having a dead-end job, living paycheck to paycheck and only live for the weekends. You haven’t read a book in ages, see every opportunity as scam and haven’t tried anything new or went beyond your comfort-zone in years. The sad reality is this: Most people live like this.

Now think you are this average person I just described – and your best friend is starting their own business. While doing that, they get a mentor, invest in their knowledge and actually work on him/herself. In the aftermath of all this, you see him less. (Let’s just say him for convenience). He won’t show up to the club, he’s waking up at 5 to hit the gym, cancels plans since something in his business came up, and he won’t hangout with you anymore. What do you say to him after a while? Exactly “You have changed…”

What happened to your friend is this: He found somebody successful that guides him on his way, he realized that running a business is a full-time job – and that 365 days a year 24 hours a day. He realized reading books improves his skills, while going to the cinema with you is a waste of his time. He doesn’t go clubbing or hanging out anymore, because he actually loves his work and found his passion in it – and wants to life live to their full potential.

How are you feeling? On the one hand, you might say to yourself “good for him” – but deep down you wish he would fail and watch stupid TV shows with you again. This is because whenever somebody levels up in their life – they actually hold up a mirror right in your face. And what you see – is nothing you want to see. It’s something that you ignored for years: That you are a failure, because you gave up on your dreams a long time ago.

So average people think the only way to escape this realization, is to blame others for their own failed existence. “You have changed” – hoping they come back to status quo and make you feel better about being a failure again.

If you are this “average” person – it’s time to stop saying to others “you have changed” and think about why you didn’t. And if you are this person who leveled up and turned their life around: Stop hanging out with people that blame you for their failure, this is pure poison.